"friendship bracelet" handcuffs holding you back
a "friendship bracelet" from your toxic friend is really just keeping you trapped. Your hands are literally tied. 

We're supposed to surround ourselves with people that make us better, people that care about us. A common saying is that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. So when you have a best friend that suddenly changes, how does that reflect on you and your own life?

This series is a part of the Hindsight series. If you don't know what that is, here's a brief summary:

The Hindsight series consists of guest posts from various bloggers sharing their stories on Bloomly about any personal experience that they might have encountered that reflects personal growth, self-improvement, and/or struggles with mental health. The Hindsight series is about looking back on experiences that shaped who we are and have helped us grow, which we only see now with hindsight.

Learn more: About the Hindsight Series 
More Hindsight posts: Read the Series

This post was written by Georgia Headdon (The Life of Gee), an 18-year old uni student and blogger who has struggled with toxic relationships plaguing her life and mental health. Here's her story and how she moved past that difficult friendship.

In today’s society I fear that the prevalence of friendships affecting mental health is all too high and matters need to be taken against this.

You have to do what is right for you and your mental health. Despite how difficult those decisions may seem at the time, they will benefit you in the long run.

If you don't look out for yourself, who will?

A best friend is someone you trust with your life, look up to, confide in, and rely on to help you through tough times. You never think that they will turn their back on you. Well, sometimes they do.

About a year ago now I had a very toxic relationship with my best friend, however, I didn't realise it at the time. We’d been inseparable for about 12 years, knew everything about each other and were always there for each other no matter what. This all changed when she got into her first relationship.

Plans would be cancelled at the last minute to see her boyfriend instead. Myself along with other friends wouldn't hear from her for weeks. She’d cut all her friends off and was starting to do the same with her family.

Since being with her boyfriend, she had changed into a completely different person whom I didn't recognise in the slightest. All the things she used to love and do she stopped doing to see a boyfriend instead — there is nothing wrong with changing slightly when in a relationship but as a best friend, when you've known someone for over 10 years you have a gut feeling that something is incredibly wrong.

After getting into her first relationship, everything and everyone else went out the window.

I felt abandoned and betrayed and spent far too long trying to figure out what I had done wrong. Myself, along with her own family had been abandoned for a current boyfriend, something I personally do not condone in the slightest. Friends are for life — you cannot always say the same for a partner.

Not wanting to lose a best friend, someone who I once could speak to about anything and everything, I reached out to her about how I felt. Upon reaching out, I had a reply. “I have a boyfriend now, I don't need you guys anymore”. We haven't spoken since.

"I have a boyfriend now, I don't need you guys anymore."

My best friend of over 10 years had abandoned me, along with many others all for some guy she’d known a few months. It started to affect my mental health. At first I thought it was my fault, that I had done something wrong. It was only after discussing the situation with my mother that I understood that some people aren't worth the effort you are willing and want to put in with them.

I’m a strong person and don't let people walk all over me and I knew that the friendship was over. I was disappointed that someone could change so much all for a guy but I wasn't going to dwell on it. I moved on with my life, focused on my studies (and am now going to my dream uni to study my dream course) and valued my true friends even more.

I don’t trust people as easily as I used to, I am a much more wary person of other people and their true intentions with me. It takes a lot more for me to open up to a person, really, I keep things to myself and try to sort out any problems / issues I am facing on my own — definitely making it harder on my part.

A true friend is there for life, through ups and downs. 

I have completely put this behind me now and I cannot see a friendship being rekindled if the opportunity arose. A friend, a true friend, is there for life, through ups and downs and through hard times and you cannot pick and choose when having friends suits you. That notion is unacceptable in my opinion.

How a Toxic Relationship Changed Me

About the Author: Georgia Headdon
Georgia Headdon is an 18 year old student just going into her first year of uni to study Psychologyrnemouth. She started a blog at the beginning of August (thelifeofgee.com) which is about all things beauty, fashion, lifestyle, baking, a new uni series, and a little bit of travel. She loves exploring new places and going on adventures.

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